The "oh so wise" Jared of Spin Off raised an excellent point today, the offense of people who marinate in their cologne but seem blissfully unaware that it might smell less offensive than their poop and/or b.o. but is still offensive just the same.
But, the real question on my mind, (raised because we have a couple of offenders here) is what about those that stink, but not of any man-made stink-pretty that they delightfully douse themselves with like it's essence of "come get me", but with straight up ass stench?
I mean, sure your eyes water and maybe you sneeze a few times. But come on! That's a tiptoe through the tulips of olfactory heaven compared to people that simply do not bathe or wash their clothes/socks/body/hair who seem intent upon assaulting our delicate noses with their fragrant noxiousness.
Could it be that some people are just unaware of it? Or are we just manufacturing excuses for them to make ourselves feel better about the fact that we are sissies and afraid to point out their hygienic failures?
Also, why is it that the people this type of comment is aimed for always falls on deaf ears? I had an associate who reeked, but I could think of no tactful way to bring it to her attention. So I just mentioned it in a meeting and blamed a "customer complaint" for the issue being raised. I mentioned no names and pointed no fingers. I should have! The person in question was completely oblivious. Instead, another girl piped up (mind you, someone that NO ONE had complained about) and said it was probably her because she, "had a fungus that the doctor gave her medication for that smells really bad and she got it cuz she didn't bathe enough." *big eyes! OMG really? and it wasn't even about her!
The other girl *ahem Justine just nodded and continued to come to work smelling like (insert some famous sports dude of which I have no idea) after a six hour (insert practice/game/ whatever the hell it is that famous sports dude of which I have no idea would be doing that would make him smell) and a lengthy roll in dog shit (just for good measure).
So take note people. Sniff your underarms, check your feet, and for god's sake look around you, if people are breathing shallowly it's probably you! Don't let yourself be forever referred to in hush tones and covered noses as, "That (insert offending person's name here)" because you are only referred to as "That (person)" for negative reasons. Unless of course it is followed by, "is a funny bastard". as in, "that Mike is a funny bastard." Then it's all good. or so I am told.
*sniff-sniff
yeah, I think I'm okay.
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Hello dear reader(s?)
Yes, I have been away yet again. Sigh. I really do mean to keep up on this blogging thing, but I am abysmally lazy and so... well, that's how it goes.
But perhaps today I shall be prompted to take up the keyboard again and actually write something here. But what to write? It seems I am most successful when I am complaining and bitching about something, but then, that's a whole lot of negativity, no?
So, maybe I should try something positive... hmm... I'm thinking! hmm... welllll, oh I know!
This past weekend was kind of fun, it rained on Saturday (yay(!) but boo(!) since I want rain but not on days I don't work sheesh) so I was not able to get out into the yard to do some much needed weeding, at least not until late in the day. At around 5-6 I finally got to go out and try to wrest a couple of the biggest weeds out of the ground. Holy god, those things seriously did not want to move! But I prevailed, and managed to pull a few out, but got soaked in the process as that they were still quite wet.
The best part of the weekend was Sunday as that it was bright and clear and my lovely roommates volunteered their time and helped me weed! Corey dug out all the lava rock from one of the planters and Connie helped me weed the rest of the yard. A couple of hours and a couple stiff backs, legs, and necks, we were mostly done and the yard, though still not fabulous looking, looked so much better! Thanks friends! (unfortunately I do not have image goodness. We didn't think to take pics until AFTER we were done. sigh)
Next up, TREES!
This weekend I have plans to plant at least 2 (maybe more) trees. I have it narrowed down to these 3 varieties.
Info about the Chaste Tree from grumpygardener.southernliving.com
"Native to southern Europe and central Asia, chaste tree quickly grows into a multi-trunked tree about 10 to 20 feet tall and wide with a broad, spreading habit. It gets its name from the erroneous medieval belief that a potion made from it could curb the libido. In reality, wearing a house dress with orthopedic shoes and multiple nose piercings is much more effective.
That doesn't mean that chaste tree doesn't have its pharmacological uses. An extract made from Vitex supposedly does a very good job of controlling PMS. Which means any of you guys out there who are routinely beaten every 28 days should definitely plant one in the yard."
I think I love the Grumpy Gardener.
The other tree I want is
The Mountain Laurel! It smells like grape soda! And is toxic! My plan of ridding my neighborhood of small obnoxious children who love grape soda is approaching fruition! muahahahahahahahaAnd lastly...
The Eastern Redbud. Yes it's true, as you can see I really like flowering trees. I think they will make a nice impact against the bland backdrop that is my house. good stuff!
Tell me what you think, which trees should I get first? The redbud is slow growing so it'll take a little time, but the chaste grows relatively fast. I will also be getting some Italian Cypresses to form a border and hopefully put a bit of shade on the house from the west.
We'll see. Can't wait for Saturday, though the digging will suck. sigh.
Holy shit, it's been ages since last I posted!
I'm not a big fan of New Year's Resolutions but I think I need to rededicate myself to at least attempting to post on this here thingy.
It's not that I lack opinions or the desire to foist my brilliance on others I've just been extremely lazy busy and haven't bothered been able to find the time to post. The roommate posts daily, if not multiple times a day, and has even increased his readership. I have contemplated that I don't really want to find myself obsessed with how many people visit and if they make comments like he seems to be. But, it is rather cathartic and enjoyable to write. Also, it doesn't hurt to get the practice with writing.
So, this is not a resolution, just simply an attempt to get myself to post with some frequency. I did try to do a 365 blog but found myself running out of new things to take pictures of. I do not have an exciting life so it's difficult to find a subject every day. With this in mind I don't know that I will be able to post on here daily, but I would like to try for a few times a week at least.
So out go the self-imposed length expectations, even if maybe all I am doing is a blog equivalent of a status update I shall try to do so.
So buckle up, this'll either be very successful, an epic fail, or pretty much the same as it has been up til now.
It was brought to my attention by someone I consider a dear and true friend that I might have unfairly focused on the LDS church and Boyd K. Packer. I think I need to qualify the statement I made earlier on Facebook and Twitter. Since I tweeted it at the same time I could only use 140 characters but there is more to it. I am not LDS. I do not hold to LDS beliefs. This man means nothing to me. I made the original joke intending to use some other old guy, but he's in the media right now and was stuck in my mind. So be it. That's the price of being relevant.
I could care less what this man thinks of me. If there is a god I will answer to him/her/it when the time comes. I feel I have lived a "righteous" life so I am confident I will be okay. *fingers crossed ;o)
I used I/me instead of us/we simply because it was easier.
The problem with what this man says is evident in the rate of suicide/attempts among LDS youth who feel that they are abominations and sinners. That they have a choice and that they choose to be this way. Imagine being told you are a certain color because you choose to be. Now try to change that color. I can speak for myself that I tried to change. I tried to not find guys attractive and I failed. I too attempted to end my life as a result (half-heartedly and obviously unsuccessfully) and have more than once found myself contemplating it, even this late in life.
People don’t understand what comes along with being gay sometimes. Some people have an easier time with it than others. I am single and have been for pretty much ever. Such is my lot in life I suppose. Am I happy about it? Hell no. Perhaps that will change.
As a result of this solitude there have been times it seemed like it would be so much easier to not have to deal with it. While I lived in Vegas that reached a peak, luckily, I withstood the onslaught of despair and reveled in the friendships I had and the family I am close to. Without that… who is to say.
So, if one were to believe what many ecclesiastic leaders preach, why don’t I just switch teams? Why don’t I just find a nice woman to settle down with? If only it were that easy. I long to spend my life with someone, and to have children and grandchildren and all the concomitant things that accompany such a life, but it is not be. Would that I could change that, but I cannot. It’s not that I haven’t tried. But it is not going to happen and I am the only one having to live that truth. Regardless of what ignorant people will tell you, there is no choice. There is no waking up suddenly realizing that, oh hey, I think I like guys now.
I could no more force myself into a loveless marriage just for the sake of not being alone. I could not put my wife and possible future children through the emotional rollercoaster that would be sure to follow. I have no desire to find myself trolling the internet via Craig’s list or some other hook-up site with the intention of finding some guys to have trysts with while pretending to be a decent and honorable family man.
This is what happens all the time. There are a ton of ads in every city of guys wanting to get with another, on the “down low” “no strings attached” “married guys ok” and all the rest. You have closeted senators and church leaders meeting other guys in bathrooms then having to face their own hypocrisy in the news when the “scandal” breaks.
I long for the world where who I love matters less than the brand of car I drive or the groups I listen to or movies and books I prefer. All are things that have no effect on the people around me, though they may have a differing opinion about, but ultimately has no impact on how they feel about me as a person.
Is this such a bad dream? Is it too much to expect? For now, apparently, it is.
I have been informed that it has been too long since last I posted. Though it seems like no one ever reads my blog it does make me feel a bit better when I am told such things, because it gives lie to the assumption that I only do it to see myself write.
So there is a question when you are creating a blog and putting down your thoughts: Is it of intrinsic worth and value, or is it simply an exercise in indulgence where you can just prattle on and on about mostly nothing excessively with little or no regard to grammar, punctuation or the joys of brevity?
Now that I put this down of course, one or more people are going to assume that I am talking directly or indirectly about them. Maybe I am (I am) but, maybe it's just further evidence of these peoples' arrogance and assumption that everything indeed is about them.
But as my friends they cannot help but influence my writing and opiniations. Is this bad? No. I think it is not.
I think the true value of reading and writing blogs is learning through them how to write and perhaps how not to. I do try to be somewhat entertaining and I hope that I succeed more often then I fail, but that is really up to the reader no?
Looking back at my blog I saw that I had very accurately commented that it would likely be a forum for me to complain and vent in. It's very useful that way.
Some days I am even grumpy when I have had nothing go on that I can complain about. Let's face it, those are the most entertaining posts.
In closing I ask myself a few questions:
1. am I overly self-indulgent in my writing
2. am I improving in my writing
3. other than ranting and raving, and maybe the occasional homo-improvement post, am I entertaining
4. do I bore people
5. are my posts too long and pedagogic
6. are they the opposite; too short and obtuse
7. because seven is supposed to be a karmic spiritual number, should I edit more, both for length and spelling/grammar/punctuation errors
All these questions and more run through my mind every time I post.
Maybe I shouldn't concern myself too much with such petty concerns, but if I hope to garner or maintain an audience I think they are paramount. So I shall ruminate on them a bit more, and hopefully not as much time will pass between now and my next post. If I am lucky maybe some punk/q-tip will cut me off in traffic and give me grist to mill on my mortar and pestle of a blog.